I can't get the Monkees song I'm a Believer out of my head today. It pops into my head whenever one of my family members starts showing a new die off symptom. To be honest, we didn't really talk much about alternative dietary interventions when I went to school for medical dietetics (if my professors are reading this and we did, in fact, discuss them, sorry for daydreaming during class!). We spent most of our time discussing medical nutrition therapy for things like diabetes, kidney disease, lung disease, heart disease, obesity, tube feeding...the list goes on and on. Because they weren't covered in my education, whenever I would hear about one of these "trendy" diets, like the flat belly diet, the blood type diet, or the anti candida diet, I would scoff and dismiss whatever was being said. I would tell myself that these were being disseminated by self-proclaimed nutritionists and that actual dietitians wouldn't be fooled by such hooey (note: some of them are hooey, so don't believe everything you read). Then I got knocked off of my high horse.
But before we get to my great equestrian fall, I should probably answer a question. What exactly is die off? The central tenet of GAPS and the anti candida diet are that your beneficial microbes (yeast and bacteria) are killed (through antibiotic use and our toxic lifestyles), pathogenic microbes multiply to fill in their place, and the pathogenic microbes wreak havoc on your health. So in doing either GAPS or anti candida, your goal is to kill the pathogenic microbes and to consume probiotics with beneficial microbes, so the beneficial microbes can fill in the places left by the dead pathogenic microbes and can keep the pathogenic ones from growing back. Basically, kill bad bugs. Eat good bugs.
Although, it's not quite that simple (is it ever?). How do overgrowths of pathogenic microbes in your flora make you sick? Pathogenic bacteria and yeast mainly harm you through secreting toxins. These toxins kill your cells and activate your immune system. Immune system activation is great if some of these pathogens get past your physical barriers and end up inside of your body because you want the immune cells to attack and destroy the invaders. The feeling of being sick is from a combination of the pathogenic toxins and the immune cell action that is taking place to destroy the microbes. But if you constantly have toxins leaking through a damaged gut wall (damaged by the very same pathogenic microbial toxins), then your immune system will constantly be activated, and you will constantly be symptomatic. Often these symptoms are at a low enough level that they don't ever bother the sufferer enough to do anything about them. Or, like most people, you have no idea why you feel crummy all the time. Further, if you feel crummy all the time, you have no idea that you feel crummy because it becomes your new normal. You don't want the pathogenic microbes in your gut in disproportionately high levels, but what happens when you start actively trying to kill them? Unfortunately, it's a whole host of awful symptoms known as die off. When you kill the pathogens, they release all of their toxins. This means that those low-level crummy-feeling symptoms that weren't really bothering you too much are now going to come at you with a vengeance.
That brings us back to today. I am experiencing die off. Dr. Dad is experiencing die off. The Hobbit is experiencing die off. And Grendel definitely is experiencing die off. And therefore, I'm a believer. This whole experience is kind of horrible and is giving me flashbacks to last summer when Grendel went through gluten withdrawal. Now that we are experiencing die off, the exact same toxins that were released into our bodies at low levels resulting in crummy feelings are now being released at much greater levels making us feel extra super crummy. How is this playing out? Essentially, we are getting worse before we can get better. I feel anxious and am suffering from reflux that had largely subsided. My psoriasis is awful and my face, which had been relatively clear for the past couple of months, broke out last week (my die off symptoms began before everyone else's because I wanted to try out the fruit and honey free portion of this diet before subjecting the rest of my family to it). Dr. Dad is just kind of fatigued (lucky duck). Unfortunately, the kids seem to be getting hit the hardest. The Hobbit is irritable to a level that she hasn't been since before we started Full GAPS (a few weeks ago). The last time she acted like this was when she was suffering from a perforated eardrum and took antibiotics to get rid of the ear infection. Once the ear pain was gone I expected her to go back to being her normal self, but she was still acting like a crazy child - I think that the starch and remaining sugars in her diet combined with antibiotics throwing her system even farther out of whack were too much for her little body to cope with. As soon as we started GAPS she was a new calm and focused child. But, alas, now we are back to the crazy, mal-adaptive child who doesn't sleep. Oh, and she has developed a rash on her arm and leg.
As for Grendel, she is throwing tantrums or crying uncontrollably for somewhere between 3 and 4 hours a day. She's a real gem to be around this holiday weekend.
One of the most pronounced symptoms that has returned is her hand flapping.
She hasn't done hand flapping since we removed gluten from her diet. At that time, many of her autistic symptoms diminished (this is why, even though she scored "probable autism" on her autism screening questionnaire, the psychologist did not diagnose her as autistic). She has also started to regurgitate again.
Unfortunately, we can't move forward in the GAPS Introductory diet from stage 1 to stage 2 until her regurgitation and my reflux resolve as GI symptom resolution is a great way to determine when your gut has healed enough to handle foods that are more difficult to digest. I am hopeful that this happens soon because I'm getting tired of soup, and the kids have let me know, in no uncertain terms, that they also are tired of soup.
In the meantime, there will probably be a little extra screen time in our lives. You gotta do what you gotta do.
But before we get to my great equestrian fall, I should probably answer a question. What exactly is die off? The central tenet of GAPS and the anti candida diet are that your beneficial microbes (yeast and bacteria) are killed (through antibiotic use and our toxic lifestyles), pathogenic microbes multiply to fill in their place, and the pathogenic microbes wreak havoc on your health. So in doing either GAPS or anti candida, your goal is to kill the pathogenic microbes and to consume probiotics with beneficial microbes, so the beneficial microbes can fill in the places left by the dead pathogenic microbes and can keep the pathogenic ones from growing back. Basically, kill bad bugs. Eat good bugs.
Although, it's not quite that simple (is it ever?). How do overgrowths of pathogenic microbes in your flora make you sick? Pathogenic bacteria and yeast mainly harm you through secreting toxins. These toxins kill your cells and activate your immune system. Immune system activation is great if some of these pathogens get past your physical barriers and end up inside of your body because you want the immune cells to attack and destroy the invaders. The feeling of being sick is from a combination of the pathogenic toxins and the immune cell action that is taking place to destroy the microbes. But if you constantly have toxins leaking through a damaged gut wall (damaged by the very same pathogenic microbial toxins), then your immune system will constantly be activated, and you will constantly be symptomatic. Often these symptoms are at a low enough level that they don't ever bother the sufferer enough to do anything about them. Or, like most people, you have no idea why you feel crummy all the time. Further, if you feel crummy all the time, you have no idea that you feel crummy because it becomes your new normal. You don't want the pathogenic microbes in your gut in disproportionately high levels, but what happens when you start actively trying to kill them? Unfortunately, it's a whole host of awful symptoms known as die off. When you kill the pathogens, they release all of their toxins. This means that those low-level crummy-feeling symptoms that weren't really bothering you too much are now going to come at you with a vengeance.
That brings us back to today. I am experiencing die off. Dr. Dad is experiencing die off. The Hobbit is experiencing die off. And Grendel definitely is experiencing die off. And therefore, I'm a believer. This whole experience is kind of horrible and is giving me flashbacks to last summer when Grendel went through gluten withdrawal. Now that we are experiencing die off, the exact same toxins that were released into our bodies at low levels resulting in crummy feelings are now being released at much greater levels making us feel extra super crummy. How is this playing out? Essentially, we are getting worse before we can get better. I feel anxious and am suffering from reflux that had largely subsided. My psoriasis is awful and my face, which had been relatively clear for the past couple of months, broke out last week (my die off symptoms began before everyone else's because I wanted to try out the fruit and honey free portion of this diet before subjecting the rest of my family to it). Dr. Dad is just kind of fatigued (lucky duck). Unfortunately, the kids seem to be getting hit the hardest. The Hobbit is irritable to a level that she hasn't been since before we started Full GAPS (a few weeks ago). The last time she acted like this was when she was suffering from a perforated eardrum and took antibiotics to get rid of the ear infection. Once the ear pain was gone I expected her to go back to being her normal self, but she was still acting like a crazy child - I think that the starch and remaining sugars in her diet combined with antibiotics throwing her system even farther out of whack were too much for her little body to cope with. As soon as we started GAPS she was a new calm and focused child. But, alas, now we are back to the crazy, mal-adaptive child who doesn't sleep. Oh, and she has developed a rash on her arm and leg.
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| Blurry picture brought to you by: a squirming, uncooperative toddler |
As for Grendel, she is throwing tantrums or crying uncontrollably for somewhere between 3 and 4 hours a day. She's a real gem to be around this holiday weekend.
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| I go back and forth between feeling really bad for her (I mean, look at that face!) and getting really super irritated because I'm only human. |
One of the most pronounced symptoms that has returned is her hand flapping.
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| It's hard to tell from a still photo, but this is her hand flapping. |
Unfortunately, we can't move forward in the GAPS Introductory diet from stage 1 to stage 2 until her regurgitation and my reflux resolve as GI symptom resolution is a great way to determine when your gut has healed enough to handle foods that are more difficult to digest. I am hopeful that this happens soon because I'm getting tired of soup, and the kids have let me know, in no uncertain terms, that they also are tired of soup.
In the meantime, there will probably be a little extra screen time in our lives. You gotta do what you gotta do.
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| Thank you Wyatt, and the super readers, for giving this mommy a break today. |
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